Monday, October 17, 2011

I Won!!

I won!! I recently had the chance to be in a vintage/Mad Men style fashion show at the Anaheim Convention Center. What a blast!

(Photo courtesy of OC Blogger Bash)

As one of three bloggers in the OC Blogger Bash fashion show, I had a fitting with Queen of Heartz designer, Letty Tennant, and a vintage hair/make up session for the show.

My dear friend Gina came along for the ride and dubbed herself my ‘personal paparazzi’. She snapped picture after picture of the hired models, myself and the other bloggers, as we practiced riding the convention center's long escalator into the lobby where the party was held.

I met the fabulous and wonderful Romy Schorr of Romy Raves, and Heather Petrey of LAFashionSnob, and the three of us had so much fun. Was I nervous? No way. I have three-year old triplets. Nothing scares me. Ok, only partially true. Falling off my three-inch heels? That scares me. Definitely not the trip I wanted. I have a not-so-secret love affair with drugstore flip-flops. I never wear heels let alone socks or stockings. And although my smile may have belied the perch off of which I was afraid to topple, I managed to stay vertical. My real concern was holding my stomach in after I enjoyed a delicious peanut butter and jelly shake whipped up at the party’s ‘classic car hop.’ WOW was that good! But bad move to have it before the fashion show.
Show time! Romy, accompanied by two of the ‘Daily Hot Guys’ on her descent into stardom, blew kisses to the crowd. Heather, sporting one of her custom made vintage hats, looked every inch a true model. Then it was my turn. I couldn’t see anything with the spotlight in my eyes, so I smiled, hoping my stomach didn’t stick out more than my kids have already stretched it, and did a little twirl on the floor. Whew, gravity didn’t have its way with me, and back up the escalator we went. Camera flashes blinked, we posed, turned, posed some more, and then, it was over. It was oh so amazing and fun! I wanted to go again.

The party was in progress as we headed down to join the fun after the show, where the stunning Kim Tracy Prince won a best dressed award, the MomsLA founders, Yvonne, Elise and Sarah, looked gorgeous, along with Caryn, Adrienne, Alexandra and many more stylish ladies!

The Anaheim CVB and MomsLA outdid themselves with the giveaways and atmosphere. Everyone got tickets to Knott’s and I won tickets to Disneyland and a bowling package. Seems our next OC trip will involve strollers, wipes, juice boxes and chasing down Buzz Lightyear and Mickey Mouse. I don’t get out to many events, but this step back in time was very enjoyable. Orange County knows how to put on a good time! Plus, I got to spend a day with a friend I rarely see. Though the party was 'in the past', that was the real present.

Monday, October 10, 2011

Cheating is Cheating

I did it. I admit. I have been so good for so long. I stayed on the straight and narrow, but then . . . I just couldn’t hold back any longer. Oh geez did it feel so good too. I melted as I reveled in the forbidden. Afterwards I felt shame, regret and I was just plain disappointed in myself. It seemed like a good idea at the time. But it doesn’t count on vacation, does it? It was just the one time. It didn’t mean anything. I wont do it again.

Or will I?

Read more here at Moms L.A.

Saturday, October 1, 2011

Come Together

I only just met her. The other ladies I know have been helping her for awhile. Although Kim has cancer, this was bigger. It was about people, women, moms, families, coming together. Do we always need a reason? Maybe. If we have one does it make it easier to donate time, effort and items for a cause? Maybe. I am rarely tempted to donate money to organizations or individuals. I tend to be more local than global. Some may not agree with that, but I know for sure that I can do only what I can do. My first priority has to be my family. Anything I can do beyond that I’ll do. In this case, I not only wanted to help, I was compelled. That is much stronger word, and one I listen to when it comes from my gut.

What I saw was an amazing collective of talents. A fashion show, bake sales, a petting zoo, food trucks, an auction and more. All under the hot sun on a beautiful California summer day. The birthday party before the park event was a great success as well, with live Star Wars characters there to help her four-year old boy celebrate in style. Light sabers for the kids, a very artistic cake and lots of yummy snacks and treats. A woman who was told she would not live to see this birthday was there with her trademark shining smile. The goose bumps rose on my arm as I watched her happiness burst out of every pore. Funds raised that day will help her medical expenses as she fights the ugly creature trying to stop her from seeing her son’s next birthday. Star Wars seemed a fitting theme, plastic light sabers for the kids to battle the bogeyman, as we made a community light saber with our donations and time, and prepare to take collective aim at Kim’s cancer.

Crack

“There is a crack in everything. That’s how the light gets in.”
~ Leonard Cohen

Most days I feel pretty good. I’m on top of things. I’m organized. Everyone said things would be easier once the kids got a bit older. Mostly I have a vague recollection of these being people who did not have triplets. There was a brief lull in time where I did believe that was true, and we seemed to be coasting along on a nice wave. It got tough again, then it calmed. Lots of amazing therapists helped, so did the occasional glass of wine. We rely on humor, and that gets us through quite a bit. The not so good days seemed to be drifting farther behind us. But lately it feels like the bad days are creeping back in, and time for recovery from the down side is getting squelched. Today it felt like they were taking over.

We are in the process of obtaining behavioral services for our son, and our daughter, who had intensive behavioral therapy last year, has started having more sensory and processing issues again. Last time I wrote about the noise. I missed the signs of her ramping up to this. Between then and now it has started to feel like no amount of wine or chocolate could possibly take the edge off days with multiple meltdowns, grunting and shrieking instead of talking, and endless spinning in circles to feed her vestibular system. I actually cried tonight. I felt like I was going to crack. And it takes a lot for me to get there. But here I am. Banking on humor, I allowed the corner of my mouth to lift slightly as I told my husband I am planning to willfully become an alcoholic. I am not an addictive person, and I know that isn’t funny to many people. But in that moment I was willing to trade how I felt for how the latter might feel because I was overwhelmed and wanted an escape.

I am so very grateful for my husband. We bail each other out when it gets rough, and he bailed me out. I feel like the world’s worst mother if I can’t manage a conflict between my own three year olds. But this isn't just a conflict. I try to remember that the issues are neurological and not always situational. I try to take my own deep breaths and count to 10. But when I lose it, or yell, or have to walk away, I am left with a feeling of regret that I cannot enjoy my children. It breaks my heart when I can’t find a way to reach them in the midst of their anxiety. It breaks my soul when I realize my limitations, and I feel selfish for being limited. I know it will pass, like a teacup that has broken and been repaired. But I will be tea-worthy again, ready to have more poured in. You’ll only see the crack if you look closely.